Do flying saucers really exist? Are strange forces from beyond visiting our planet, tooling around in UFOs, mutilating cattle, probing innocent horror writers, and inducing kooks to commit suicide while wearing trendy sneakers? Probably not. But that doesn't stop people from making a buck off 'em!
Martin and Carla are just your average American couple who spend their evening boring guests with slides. No wait, they're providing evidence of extra-terrestrial intelligent life - AND boring their guests! But there's one man who isn't going to take it any more.
Those fakes are just spoiling things for the HONEST flying saucer researchers! As we all know the field of flying saucer research is packed with reliable, intelligent, professional investigators, producing valuable and irrefutable research. You know, like... um... that guy... you know... um...
Surprisingly it turns out that Martin and Carla are - GET THIS - faking their UFO photos. Yeah, I know, it's a shock. And at a dollar a head they are really making a lot of cash out of these suckers! Why, there must have been three or four people in that room! Imagine the profits they could make if they invested in a few more folding chairs.
Martin's big dreams of holding a giant flying saucer convention at their farm - $2 admission!! - is interrupted by two people from a third grade math class who are here to tell him he could make more money working at McDonalds.
No, actually they are there to contradict Martin's crazy made up BS about Venus. Not that you couldn't do that with the "U-V" edition of the World Book Encyclopedia.
Well Martin, you dared them to show you their flying saucer, and look, there it is, a flying saucer. Happy now?
I would think that when you get inside a saucer and it starts flying, asking "Can this really be a flying saucer?" is sort of superfluous. Nice to see people travel 25 million miles just to debunk a hoaxer. I guess there isn't much happening on Venus. CONTINUED AFTER THIS MESSAGE FROM OUR SPONSOR
Boy, remember when they detected all those UFOs with these things? And at only $17.95 it's a bargain! Runs on one AA battery so you KNOW it's powerful! I have ANOTHER kind of detector that is PINGING LIKE CRAZY whenever I look at this ad.
AND NOW BACK TO THE STORY.
Because that's the definitive piece of evidence necessary to convince audiences you've been to Venus; how fast you drove.
WE DO NOT WANT GREEDY EARTHMEN TO VISIT OUR FAIR PLANET! WHICH IS WHY WE BROUGHT YOU TWO GREEDY EARTHMEN TO OUR FAIR PLANET! OH WAIT
So it was totally looking like they were going to be able to continue their living room UFO meetings WITHOUT having to lie - but suddenly all their previous lies caught up with them! And then the wolf REALLY came and nobody listened. Tragic, really. On a more serious note, you'd think that your real-life UFO hoaxers would know enough to hide or destroy the models they use for their fake photos, but you'd be surprised, wouldn't you, Billy Meier of Gulf Breeze Florida?
I like how Carla spent her whole trip to Venus taking pictures but when they get back to Earth Martin is all THOSE PICTURES ARE WORTHLESS ANYTHING CAN BE FAKED! They why bother taking pictures at all? And as we leave RUINED! RUINED! MARTIN with his dreams of making five or ten dollars an evening shattered on the ground, we draw the curtain on this cautionary tale of STUPID COMICS. Remember kids, to make the big bucks in the UFO field, (1) hide your UFO hoax models, (2) make sure you have plenty of folding chairs, (3) pick planets nobody actually lives on, and (c) whatever, just wing it, UFO nuts will believe ANYTHING.
Now you can buy Stupid Comics merchandise from the Mister Kitty Stupid Store, your One-Stop Stupid Shop!!
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