You've probably seen this cover on any one of dozens of those annoying sites that make fun of comic books. Aren't those websites annoying? Don't you hate the way those sarcastic mockers insult the hard work of professional artists? Why, I oughtta... wait a minute.
YES you've seen this cover of the praying mantises riding humans. But what of the story behind the cover? Does it truly depict an amazing human race? Let's find out.
Four Freedoms Plaza in New York attacked by four-foot praying mantises in space helmets with rocket ships and ray guns? That's a good start. I like how the caption informs us that Earth was prepared for an invasion from space or an "onslaught from the interior of the Earth". How, exactly? Did we finally pave everything everywhere?
Dr. Adair has built a machine that allows us to look inside the minds of animals. You don't really need a machine for that - the dog wants Alpo and the cat wants you to rub its belly so that it may savagely attack you - but I guess a machine would make things easier, or something.
Hooking the mantis up to his machine, Dr. Adair begins to see that praying mantises dream of world domination, directed from tastefully appointed board rooms!
The mantises ate special foods, measured their growth with a growth chart stolen from your kid brother's room, and attacked us with nuclear weapons, all explained by a flashback, within a dream.
And thus the mantises conquered the human race. Step one of their world domination plan - force humans to act as servants! Luckily, millions of humans already work as servants so it's not really that big of a deal.
And here we have our money shot, our cover and splash page image, as mantises ride humans in a race that was no doubt inspired by a certain comic book writer's afternoon spent sweating out the DTs at the track. So this made the cover and the splash page, obviously the spectacle of the Amazing Human Race will play a really important part in the resolution of this story, right?
Nope, never seen again. Instead it's man versus mantis for the fate of the world!
And another insect goes down before the mighty tennis shoe of Man. Or handgun, whatever.
Our scientific conclusion is that either (a) you're crazy, or (b) praying mantises can have amazing visions of the future, visions that go beyond the usual "having sex and then my head gets ripped off" praying mantis future.
KEEP ON THE ALERT! REPORT ANY NOTICEABLE INCREASE IN PRAYING MANTIS SIZE TO YOUR LOCAL PRAYING MANTIS ATTACK PREVENTION LEAGUE- IMMEDIATELY! This has been a public service announcement. You may now rejoin... the amazing human race.
Now you can buy Stupid Comics merchandise from the Mister Kitty Stupid Store, your One-Stop Stupid Shop!!
PREVIOUS STUPID COMICS
NEXT STUPID COMICS
BACK TO STUPID COMICS INDEX
BACK TO MAIN INDEX