Our obsession with Westerns continues as we present an exciting John Wayne comic story! What, you didn't know The Duke had his own comic book? Well, I'm not going to tell him he can't have his own comic book, are YOU going to tell him he can't have his own comic book? What are you, some kind of pinko commie?
We join Hollywood star John Wayne and his grizzled sidekick Bonanza as they take time off from their busy film schedule and roam the West on horseback, righting wrongs and investigating ghost towns.
New signage in ghost towns? This bears investigation from the squinty eye of Wayne!
Word on the street - okay, the cow path - says this show is going to be a sure-fire sellout extravaganza, so you'd better rush right on down to the ghost town and get your tickets!
Apparently getting tickets to this vaudeville show involves Iron Man comics and boards covered in paste. This Western slang is confusing!
Nope, nothing creepy at all about watching a one-man show alone in a deserted theater in a ghost town. No sir.
And the juggler STRIKES! This is the kind of audience-participatory theater that John Wayne can do without!
The Juggler explains his brilliant plan to catch the people trying to steal his nonexistent gold. He'll put up a bunch of signs luring people into his ghost town - people who otherwise would never come into his ghost town - and then assault them during a vaudeville show! That will teach those complete strangers a lesson about looking for gold they had no idea was there and weren't looking for to begin with!
And just like all the great villians of history, The Juggler has a complicated execution plan all figured out for his enemies. It's not hard to believe this guy has spent a lot of time by himself.
Luckily John Wayne escapes by throwing rocks and running away. That's the John Wayne we know and love from all his great movies!
A convenient cave-in conveniently drops our crazed jugg-a-loo and being the swell fella he is, John Wayne drags him to safety.
Conveniently, the cave-in also exposed the gold our nutty juggler was looking for all this time! But he doesn't want it, because as he carefully explains, if he doesn't find it himself it's no good to him. Emotionally, I mean. One might come to the conclusion that our juggling friend is an obsessive compulsive kook who should take that gold and get himself some of that new-fangled psychoanalysis. And John Wayne rides into the sunset, ready to star in THE GREEN BERETS and THE CONQUEROR and JET PILOT. Keep 'em flying, Duke!
Now you can buy Stupid Comics merchandise from the Mister Kitty Stupid Store, your One-Stop Stupid Shop!!
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